Mistakes
by Disintegrating Vortex
Summary: The mistakes Light made would cost him. SPOILERS FOR EP 25CHAP 58!


Usually my depressing-ramble!fics are too bad too post... this one's okay, tho.

Music: "L no Kako" (L's Past) - DN OST 3

* * *

Light had made a mistake. 

In theory, all the components of his deadly plan were perfect- knocking down two unnecessary obstacles in one brilliant stroke, clearing the way for his unopposed rein as Kira. It had been obvious from the beginning that L was something that needed eliminating, after all.

This Kira game had at first been quite surreal- he, not fully believing or comprehending the true power of the Death Note, had written name after guilty name. He of course knew none of them- but, as the television had dubbed them criminals, so surely must he condemn them. This was Light's faith. And L, the man who stood in his way, was just another annoyance, just another evildoer who threatened Kira's existence. Light had known neither his name or his face, but as an obstruction of true justice, he obviously deserved to die like all the rest. A faceless enemy- so easy to hate, so easy to wish dead.

That perception had changed. The youth with the messy raven hair, crouching beside him in the auditorium, had, with a single sentence- _"I am L,"_ altered Light's image of the enemy. Now with a face and a name (albeit one as fake as their friendship), he could no longer consign L to the anonymous shadows. Perhaps he was even managing to fool himself with the false smiles and scripted words- _this isn't really L, this is not my mortal enemy-_

But Light went through with the plan anyway. He couldn't stop now, for the momentum of his previous deeds propelled him further into the web of deceit and murder. There was no time to stop and contemplate lost opportunities...

He'd made a mistake, though, spending all that time with Ryuuzaki. Working so long on the Kira case together had brought them closer than was wise for murderer and victim-to-be. The longer he knew Ryuuzaki, the more like a real person he seemed, and the harder it was for Light to convince himself that killing was justice.

However... the worst mistake of all was diving to catch Ryuuzaki's body as he fell inevitably downwards. Those few moments of life left in the great detective were enough for Light to register that he was holding a living, warm, body. And all the more horrorific to realize, then, that it had suddenly _stopped_ being that and was now growing cold in his arms. The shock triggered a few frantic, regretful thoughts.

_For one second, he'd felt a heartbeat there beside his own. If only he hadn't, if Rem hadn't, if Kira hadn't-_

But he had... and now he was holding a corpse. And every bright and beautiful thing about L was gone in that instant, and Kira had an empire to build.

_Just another name. Just another coffin in the ground._

He walked away from it all unscathed. Triumphant from that night's victory, he never quite realized... Light Yagami died that night as well.

The son who loved and supported his father, the brother who helped and guided his sister, the friend who kept lonely souls company, the student who was always courteous and efficient, the boy who wanted to help his failing world be pure again... the only thing left in that hollow shell was _Kira._

Kira could pretend to be Light Yagami very well. But Kira would use that position for his own advantage, twisting those beliefs until he could justify killing, and killing again, people close to him and anyone deemed unworthy of Kira's world, until even shinigami trembled.

Kira looked down at the dead body of his former comrade and laughed. And deep inside, from his hollow cell, the thing that was Light Yagami, long tortured, now faltered and died, victim to his own ruthless cruelty.

* * *

Okay, it's over. I admit, that was a little intense, so forgive me if a part doesn't make sense/repeats/contradicts itself. This is more a requiem to Light than anything else, because I believe he was dealing with some kind of split thing, as proven when he loses his memories and is actually -le gasp!- a decent person. And I'm also pretty much with the school that stopped liking Light after he killed L. So I say, Kira took over. Or something. Tell me what you think...? 


End file.
